Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t cotton to rapists

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

How do I cancel WFG Life insurance?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

What changed for Shedeur Sanders over the past 2 weeks, and his status in the Browns QB competition: Mary Kay - Cleveland.com

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I can count

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

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I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

How do professional musicians handle their equipment during gigs? Do they bring their own or use the venue's sound system?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Is sunscreen toxic? The UV truthers on the internet sure think so. - The Boston Globe

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Has your mother ever walked in on you at an inappropriate time?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

McDonald’s bringing it’s own version of iconic dessert to its McFlurry menu - MLive.com

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Harvard scientists issue 'toxic' warning over 'hidden dangers' of protein powders - LADbible

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

See how the national debt grew to more than $36 trillion - The Washington Post

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I see through liars

I don’t buy bullshit

Turns Out, AI Gobbles Up a Lot of Energy - Newser

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have a reading level above third grade

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I actually pay taxes

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I can read

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet